


Jeremy Heere versus the mad expanse of tumblr's cute date ideas

by FrickinFabFutureFangirl



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Bi Jeremy, Capital F Feelings, Crying, Cuddling, Emotions, Fluff and Angst, Gay Michael, Hurt/Comfort, I wrote this instead of studying, Michael Mell's Eyes, Pining, Sad, Short Michael, Tea is just glorified leaf juice i swear to god, These tags make it sound much happier than it is, change my mind, how is that not a tag yet, i dare you, post squip, soft, that one goddamn squorl, vent fic because I'm sad and need affection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-21
Updated: 2019-03-21
Packaged: 2019-11-26 15:46:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18182570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrickinFabFutureFangirl/pseuds/FrickinFabFutureFangirl
Summary: The title doesn't show up at all in the first chapter, honestly its just angst. It also might be terrible, I personally liked it. Jeremy pines and has guilt about how he treated Michael. Capital F Feelings occur.





	Jeremy Heere versus the mad expanse of tumblr's cute date ideas

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I wrote this instead of doing more work on updating the Witch Michael AU. I was bored and wanted some angst. honestly I expected this to just be a texting fic, but there turned out to be no texting. Maybe in future chapters if I continue it. Leave a comment with feedback or requests please, I'm uninspired and live off validation, leave a kudos if you want!

It was about 11:30 at night and Jeremy sat on his bed sipping tea and scrolling through tumblr. Well, sat isn't exactly the right word for it, more like hunkered down into a croissant-shaped blanket formation. Either way, he was situated comfortably on his bed, surrounded by blankets, drinking glorified leaf juice with bee vomit in the late P.M. And looking through memes, shitposts, and ways to tell your best friend of twelve years that you've been head over heels in love with him for the past three and a half months.

Yeah.

Jeremy had a bit of a problem.

Hell, he wasn't even out as bi yet! It's not that he's worried Michael won't be supportive, of course he will, the gay ass. It's the question of 'oh, how did you know?' Jeremy didn't want to answer that question. He took another sip of his tea and looked back at tumblr. Suddenly the pressure of how to tell someone you like them was making him feel sick. He closed out of the tab and took a few steadying breaths. After the whole Squip incident, his anxiety had been acting up a lot more. Why wouldn't it, a supercomputer was implanted in his brain and he had no permanent way of shutting it off, that would be enough to give the Rock anxiety. He felt his hands shake around his mug and tried to ground himself.

He thought of Michael. Michael had stuck with him, even- no, _especially_ when Jeremy wasn't there for him. Michael with his soft hair and his ridiculous laugh and his perfect smile. Michael with his frankly surprising amount of hoodies and his stockpiled 7/11 gift cards. Michael and his glasses with tape around the middle even though they were never broken (there) and his weed socks and his beauty marks and his eyes-

Michael's eyes. Michael and his eyes that were the only thing that let Jeremy know what was going on in his head. Michael and his scrunched up eyes when he smiled, Michael with his bright eyes when he's going off about some new game or the latest nature documentary on Netflix, Michael with his eyes that softened when he was around someone he cared about. Jeremy curled further into himself. He loved those eyes. Those eyes used to be the only ones he saw. But not anymore. Now he's seen Michael's eyes harden when he was angry, truly angry, the kind that sent fire coursing through his veins and made him want to yell. Michael's eyes looking so desperate when he was helpless. Michael's eyes go blank when he had given up. Michael's eyes when he was afraid, big and dark and looking like they could swallow the universe and it still wouldn't be enough. And he's seen Michael cry. Only once, but that was more than enough to make sure he never wanted him to cry again. His eyes filling up with tears and all the emotions he couldn't control anymore, all the fear and anger and helplessness that he couldn't hide pouring out in heaving sobs. Those eyes, shut tight, trying to hold it together until the couldn't and the tears rushed down his face and- Jeremy broke down in tears. He quickly set down his tea and wiped his eyes, his breath coming in shudders and catching as he tried to get ahold of himself. Before he knew what he was doing he had picked up the phone and dialed Michael's number.

"Jere! I was just about to-"

" _I'm so sorry Micha, I'm so,_ " The crying boy heaved in another breath. " _so_ _sorry. I should've been a better friend, I should never have taken that_  
_stupid pill-_ " Jeremy broke down again in tears, unable to really speak.

Michael's voice filtered through the line.

"Jeremy, it's okay, you're okay, I forgive you."

Jeremy tried and failed to respond, the only sound coming out a choked off sob.

"Jeremy, breathe. I'm coming over, alright? I live just down the street, I'll be right there in a few minutes. Do you want me to stay on the phone?"

Jeremy nodded frantically, before realizing that Michael couldn't see him, and instead attempting to give some form of verbal affirmation.

"Uh huh, please stay Michael, I don't want to lose you again, please stay on-"

"I'm not going anywhere Jeremy, I'm staying right here. I'm leaving my house now, okay? I'm walking down the street past Mrs. Bridges and her cats, remember them? Stanley and Jane and Leo?"

"Mm-hmm," Jeremy nodded, calming down a bit.

"Remember that time that she was babysitting us and Leo found my retro Pepsi sweatshirt and practically claimed it as his own?" Michael laughed a bit over the line and Jeremy melted into his blankets. He thought it might be safe to take another sip of tea at this point. He was proven wrong when a screech came through the other line and he spilled half of his mug down his front.

"Michael, oh my god Michael are you alright?!" Jeremy was practically in hysterics.

"I'm fine, it was just that damn squirrel that thinks he owns the entire neighborhood. I see your house now, should I come in through the front or is your dad home?"

Jeremy had more questions but more important matters were at hand. He thought for a minute before responding.

"Window, he's a deep sleeper but I don't want to disturb him, he's really been trying harder and he needs his sleep." By this point, Jeremy's sobs had faded to the occasional hiccup. He looked at his window, making sure it was unlocked and open just a bit. It always was, but it couldn't hurt to check.

"Jere, I need to hang up now so I can climb this tree, okay? I'll see you in a bit."

Michael hung up and Jeremy snuggled up deeper into his blanket. He knew Michael would be up in a few seconds. As if on cue, he heard his window open further and he turned around to see Michael climbing out of the window, looking out of breath. Michael closed the window and looked at the boy wrapped up in the window. He let out a breath.

"Oh, _Jeremy._ " Michael saw the spilled tea and the dark circles under Jeremy's eyes. He saw how pale he was. He saw the tears welling up in the blue eyes and he couldn't stand there anymore. He rushed forward and wrapped his arms around the other boy, who followed suit.

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be."

The two sat there for a while. Michael noticed the other boy was shaking and he leaned back, tilting Jeremy's head up towards his face.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked gently.

Jeremy shook his head.

"Can we just cuddle instead?" Jeremy responded, looking up at the other boy.

"Of course. But first, I'm falling off the bed here, scootch over." Jeremy smiled and did as requested. The pair laid down, still holding onto each other.

"Can you stay over tonight?" Jeremy asked, words coming out muffled due to the fact that his face was still buried slightly in Michael's hoodie.

"Jere, I don't speak fluent sweater. Repeat?"

Jeremy took his face out of Michael's chest.

"Can you stay here with me tonight?"

"Of course Jere." Jeremy was satisfied with this and curled back into Michael's hoodie. Michael combed his fingers through Jeremy's hair as he drifted off to sleep, his emotions having worn him out.

 

"I'll always be here."

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact: my ex boyfriend said I’ll always be here when I told him I had a giant fat crush on him, and also when he broke up with me. Is that closure? Who knows. Anyway I thought that might just make what Michael said more meaningful to some of you. It’s also entirely possible that you don’t care at all, to which I say I am not surprised. Anyway, this may or may not continue with more chapters, I'm not entirely sure yet. Actually who am I kidding, this fic is practically begging to have a waking up next to each other and being cute or awkward boners chapter, not sure which. comment which you would prefer? As per usual, thank you all so much to anyone who reads and everyone who doesn't, buh bye!


End file.
